The saddest song
This morning something happened that touched my soul like nothing else. I had just come in the house from feeding and cleaning the horses and Louie had been outside enjoying the morning with me like he does every day. We had been outside for about an hour. When we came in I gave him a Kong full of mini peanut butter milk bone biscuits and went into the bathroom to wash up. That was when I heard it. A quiet,sad,gut wrenching song…….what IS that I thought? I was getting chills up my spine and it was so sad it was hurting my heart. I listened and there it was again, so soft, so sad …… I opened the door and followed the sound and there was Lou on his bed softly singing(howling) the most gut wrenching song I had ever heard. His eyes were closed and he was lying down but in an upright position, softly,sadly,singing his song. In that moment I burst into tears. I felt as if he new his time was almost over,and he was so sad…. I know dogs live in the moment,but this was so primal,so different from anything I have ever experienced! I quickly sat down next to him on his bed and rubbed his back and hugged him. He stopped as soon as he realized I was there (it was almost as if he was somewhere else while it was happening)I can’t get it out of my mind…..Lou is sleeping now, snoring loudly 🙂 and things are back to usual…….but……what was that? what was he saying? This journey has been full of ups and downs, but this truly was one of the worst downs yet……my heart is hurting still 🙁 
4 comments so far
5:26 pm - 5-11-2016
First of all, as upsetting as this post is for you, the rest of us get the JOY of seeing a SPECTACULAR close up picture of that glorious mug of Lou’s!! 🙂
AND, we got an update on how well he is doing and what a great time he is STILL having being Louie!!!!!
We humans sure do interpret things in a very individual way and through our own filters! For whatever it’s worth, my interpretations varied but none had sadness to it at all!
First of all, while we try desperately to live in the moment, subconsciously we have that “waiting for the other shoe to drop” filter with every little thing that happens.
A dog sings for so many reasons. Honest to goodness, the first thing that crossed my mind was that Lou heard something with his excellent hearing that you could not. He may have heard a siren waaaaay off in the distance……or even another dog howling way off in the distance……something that you were completely unaware of.
I know you have other animals. He may have been “communing” with one of them on a level out of your realm of consciousness.
Heck, the way you described it, he may have already started dozing off and was dreaming of chasing rabbits and squirrels with a pack of hunting dogs! Seriously!
The song of dogs is so beautiful and full of contentment and connection with their heritage. It’s not sad or melancholy. They are human words. Lou was singing his song of joy…whether half asleep, or “singing with” something he heard in the distance.
Want to do something to shake off that human “ugh” you attached to his beautiful song?? Really! Don’t let anyone see you though! Here we go! Start “singing” with him! Start a song….start howling! He’ll start singing joyfully with you….or else he’ll cover his ears run into the other room!
Would love to have an update after you try and sing with him…video would even be better!! And “readjust” your subconscious filter, okay? The one you used today does NOT serve you at all! Big Lou is clearly living life to the fullest and clearly is being loved and spoiled like crazy! Louie is enjoying every aspect of every moment with you!
Looking forward to an update!
Lots of love!
Sally and Alumni Happy Hannah and Merry Myrtle and Frankie too!
10:12 pm - 5-11-2016
I agree, we need a video of you singing and howling with Louie!
Ditto..we silly humans put our own definitions on animal behavior so often. We project our fears and worries onto behaviors that our animals may have exhibited all along, only now cancer is involved, those behaviors are magnified.
I’m betting that Louie heard something far far away and responded. Remember, their hearing is SO much better than ours. Jerry used to howl low, low tunes randomly, we could never predict when, unless we instigated it.
I agree, start howling and encourage Louie to do the same. You guys already make beautiful music together, we want more!
1:24 am - 5-12-2016
Sweet Louie!
My Buddy would howl whenever my phone rang and I couldn’t hear it.
Don’t overthink it. It was a moment. If Louie is OK and not in any pain, then just enjoy the moment.
xoxoxo
Julie and Spirit Buddy
6:47 pm - 5-12-2016
Still looking for that video.of you and Lou singing!! Actually, the main reason I keep coming back is to look at that SPECTACULAR photo of Louie! Sooooo in love with this dog! 🙂